Saturday, May 12, 2007

Why Books Can Be As Good As Kids

I'm not a mother. I passed on that option a number of years back for a number of reasons. In the long run, I know it was a sound move. I've long since got over my kid-phobia and now find well-mannered little munchins a treat. (Note the well-mannered in that sentence). You can have great fun with them and then hand the little mites back to their parents when they get cranky, or suddenly develop teething symptoms.

However, since it's Mother's Day, I'd like to offer my ideas of why books can can be better than kids. All tongue in check, of course, so don't go nuclear on this, okay?

Books Can Be Better Than Kids Because:

1) They may expect you to get up at 3 a.m. and take care of them, but they don't require diaper changes.

2) You never worry what your book is doing at midnight and if it's going to be in before curfew.

3) Books do not borrow your clothes.

4) Books do not whine at you about a new pair of tennis shoes, the latest album or why all the other books have cars.

5) Books don't show up on your doorstep, a wee book in their arms of unknown parentage.

6) Books can't be busted by the cops for possession of illegal substances.

7) Books do not get tattoos or studs on their covers.

8) Books do not get crushes, fall in love with other books that are too old for them or get divorces.

9) Books do not run up your phone bill, your charge card or get their pages dyed pink.

10) Books do not get speeding tickets, require braces or have an identity crises.

On the downside, books do not send you flowers for Mother's Day or give you a big hug and say "Love ya, mom."

So I wish all the mums out there a very happy day. Consider yourself lucky, ladies.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

re: World Fantasy 2008 podcast interview with Dragon Moon Press

Dear Ms. Oliver;

I am contacting you through your blog as I was unable to locate an e-mail address for you;

I am with the podcasting committee for the World Fantasy 2008 convention. We will be conducting an interview with Gwen Gades of Dragon Moon Press in June. We thought it would be an interesting interview if all (or most) of the questions came from some of the DMP authors. To that end, we are asking if you would be able to submit recorded question(s) we may play on our podcast for Gwen to answer? We would like the recording to either be in WAV or MP3 format. If we receive duplicate questions, we will take the one we feel is the best recording .

We would like the questions to follow this format: Authors Name; DMP publication; question(s)

We request that questions be submitted by June 10th 2007.

So far we have the following:

Scott Sigler What has being upfront with pod casting done as far as bringing new authors to DMP?

Tee Morris If writing a novel, how long would you like it to be?
With the list of authors you are publishing, do you find time to sleep?

Michael R. Mennenga: How many authors are pod casting?
What impact has pod casting had on your business model?
Really good authors who would make good podcasters, or really good podcasters who would make good authors - are these what you are actively seeking?


Thank you for your time.

Ryah Deines
World Fanasy 2008
www.worldfantasy2008.org
info@worldfantasy2008.org

Jana Oliver said...

Ryah
Sure would. Do I contact you at the email listed at the bottom of your comment?

There is an email link on the front page of my website, upper left side, though it is very dinky. Me thinks I need to make it bigger.

Thanks!